So it’s been like three months since I updated this blog. Initially I didn’t want to post this since it’s like 2-3 days away from 2015 and I may as well “So it’s been like three months since I updated this blog. Initially I didn’t want to post this since it’s like 2-3 days away from 2015 and I may as well “start anew” by posting on 1st Jan. But I suddenly got inspired to write so screw this haha.
So this is my first post where the title isn’t a song name (Okay maybe no one notice it) and I just feel like I should change up my writing style because while I was re-reading it, it seemed kind of pretentious lol. But forgive me okay, I was feeling deep and emotional~ I supposed it’s a phase I will probably never get out of.
I wanted to refrain from using singlish/broken english, but my english sucked anyway and I just wanted to have something that I’d feel proud of. However, that 3 months gave me much to think about. I mean, who exactly am I trying to impress anyway? Not going to lie, I want to look deep. Not for everyone else but for myself, just so I can look back at myself and think “wow I was so deep” 20 years later. I also didn’t want to touch much on what’s going on in my life for fear I’d spill things I probably wasn’t supposed to say or sensitive stuffs. And everyone knows that whatever that is on the internet can never be erased. So much drama were caused over some stupid tweet or facebook post, so let’s just save on those dramas.(And in case my future employers wants to check or something and they find out I’m a horrible person from my posts.)
I’ve thought of deleting this blog countless times because the paranoid part in me thinks that I have (future) assholes in my life that reads (or would read) this blog and laugh behind my back. But these 3 months has given me much room to think about other things beyond minor things like this. I would like to have blog that I can read in the future and smile because it contains all my memories. Hence I’m thinking of changing up the way I write because while I was re-reading my previous posts, all i could think was “woah why am I sad 80% of the time.”
Also, I no longer want to dwell on things I have dwell upon in the past anymore. Neither am I going to give anyone the benefit of doubt anymore. Innocent until proven guilty? How about guilty until proven innocent. What’s the point of caring so much anyway? The one that gives the most, loses the race. Life is a cruel place indeed.
Alas I don’t think my writing style will ever change. anew” by posting on 1st Jan. But I suddenly got inspired to write so screw this haha.